Some random additions to my life's knowledge.

I have had a rather educational month involving some new and past people that I encountered. While spending the last couple of days forwarding emails and chains with co-workers and friends there are some things that we have determined.

-Twang = low class.
I was telling the President of our company a story from my recent trip that involved “Twang” and while she was laughing, she had no idea what it was (as I didn’t either previously). She later came out of her office and laughing reported “I just googled Twang, that is scary”. We then had a good laugh at the merchandise. Bored today? Google it…. Worth it.

- “That’s why I carry a knife.” Is a phrase you do not want to hear from the girl who is driving you around. Ever.

- There is an unimaginable amount of sexual references and gestures that can be made while cooking out. I will never look at condiments the same again.

Be cautious when the person you are with is so inconsiderate, that the mere offer of a tv tray in thoughtfulness makes even the most unworthy of candidates suddenly become mildly appealing. Remind yourself that “better than” is not equal to “good enough”.

There is actually a person out there that is perfectly happy being a permanent third wheel. And the other two wheels are ok as well…. Friends and I have continuously debated the Freudian possibilities of this one.

My friends are fabulous, hilarious, and so supportive. This forum does not have the room for all the encouraging words I have received over the last few days. I literally called atleast 10 of them on my drive home to tell them how much I appreciated them. I am sad for people who do not know real friendship.

It is possible for an individual to be SO incredibly CLOSED minded they actually think they are open minded. This is true, and rather frightening.

Christina wins with one of the best lines ever “You’ve seen his cards, and they suck.” And then there is the example of reassuring…
“He knows that he is out of his league when it comes to you, and it scares him so he is avoiding the whole situation. He KNOWS he messed up and he just can't do the right thing. He just isn't mature enough to deal with it. Unfortunately.

This is a reflection on him and his inability, not you
He has no idea how much entertainment we have had at his expense. Priceless!”


It is rather nice when you know you are correct in manners. I have not found one person, stranger or friend who disagrees with me here. Leaving right before your guest arrives is rude, and I have never had so many people tell me so. However as Shawn pointed out, it would have been ruder to say “oh and could you start dinner when you arrive?”

And most importantly – I have learned my tolerance for crass and juvenile people is a combined total of 2.50 days. That is when you must provide straight tequila.

Trust me – Google Twang.

Wow... really?!

So last week I was fortunate enough to discover one of the benefits of home ownership. I had an air conditioning leak that resulted in a waterfall in my closet. These are the times when you wish you rented and could just call the landlord. Fortunately I have a home warranty (thank you JP.. love you) - so it was covered. There was a pipe problem so a plumber was supposed to contact me. Today I get this phone call from my home warranty company..

Man : "Good Afternoon Ma'am this is _______ from your home warranty company, I was following up to make sure your plumbing issue was taken care of"

Me : "Actually no one has called me about that."

Man: "Really? Well let me see, ______ was supposed to call you but it looks like they have the incorrect number. They have a 222-333-4444, what is your actual phone number?"

To which the only thing I could do was reply....

"The one you just called me on."

So sir....as Bill Engvall would say.... Here's your Sign.

20 vs 26

I am not sure when it happened, it just crept up on me. I didn't see it coming, there was no warning and BAM - I'm old.

When I was 20 years old (we'll go with 21 for legal standings) I knew where the specials were at bars for EVERY SINGLE night of the week. My life was school and work during the day, a nap, and a bar at night until it closed. I could pre party, party, and after party with the best of them.

No more.

I don't know if its having a full time job, having full adult responsibilities, or my liver being beaten in years previous, but I am no longer in the glory days folks.

For proof, this is me at 2am after a night out. A night out that started at 10pm. This is me, the girl who used to party until 4am. 20 vs 26 = BIG difference.